


Letters Home

by raendown



Series: KakaYama Week 2017 [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-31 17:55:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10904433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raendown/pseuds/raendown
Summary: For the tumblr prompt "distance"





	Letters Home

The air in his office was stifling. Not hot, because the late autumn air had actually convinced him to add another layer under his formal robes of office, but stifling. It felt hard to breathe, hard to concentrate. He hadn’t wanted this job in the first place and on days like today it was especially difficult to remember why he had accepted it. Hokage. He felt like there could be no word in any language that would describe him _less_. He didn’t feel worthy.

His hands fisted on the top of his desk as his head fell back against his chair. He wasn’t getting anything done and yet he had so much to do. He just couldn’t seem to concentrate. The room was so empty it echoed, teaming up with the darkness of midnight to create a gloomy ambiance that perfectly suited his mood. He could pack up and go home, call it a day. He should. But he knew that the only thing waiting for him at home was an empty refrigerator and a cold bed. As much as he hated his paperwork even that seemed a warmer comfort right now. 

His head lifted at a sudden pinging noise. He looked around and saw the silhouette of a bird just on the other side of the window, tapping its beak against the glass. Strange, most messenger birds returned to their roosts where shinobi were always on watch to receive them and pass the messages on to the appropriate recipients. Kakashi rose from his chair and hurried over to the window. When he pulled it open the hawk gave a soft caw and hopped on to his outstretched arm. It’s brown and white feathers were glossy in the glow of his desk lamp, the only source of light in the room, and he gave it a stroke to reward its hard work. The bird extended its leg and waited patiently for the scroll tied there to be removed, but as soon as it was free of its burden it took wing again, soaring out the window in to the night. Obviously the sender was not expecting a reply.

Returning to his comfortably squishy chair, Kakashi unsealed the scroll with a simple hand sign and unrolled it across his desk. A gentle smile stretched under his mask as he recognized Yamato’s handwriting. Turning the lamp so he could see better, he leaned in and began reading, his eyes drinking in each curve of each character as if he could retroactively watch Yamato drawing them. 

It started out all business, of course. Root had drilled certain habits in to Yamato since he was a child and work always came first with him. Kakashi read through the details of Orochimaru’s latest movement’s with a flicker of guilt still burning in his gut. He hated that it was Yamato out there, following his first abuser around on a wild goose chase. But when the snake man had slithered out of their clutches, killing his previous guard in the escape, Yamato had volunteered to chase after him. 

“That’s stupid,” Kakashi had said to him bluntly. “Out of everybody in this village I would rather send a green civilian to go after him than _you_. I know what he did to you. And I know what you’ve gone through because of him. Why would I make you chase after the last living reminder of one of the darkest points of your life?” Yamato, of course, had only smiled in that soft way he did. 

“All your best trackers are out of the village right now. I’m the best choice for this. I’ll be okay, Kakashi, you don’t have to worry so much about me. I _am_ a big boy.” He always had a way of sounding perfectly reasonable even when he was saying something so atrociously dumb. 

Kakashi had sighed and run a hand through his hair, irritated at the situation. Then he had turned back to the other man with a glare to say, “It’s temporary, do you understand me? The moment one of my trackers return they are heading right back out to take your place. I will _not_ put this burden on you.” 

Their goodbye that night had been nothing short of vicious. He had taken Yamato with the kind of abandon the younger man usually had to coax out of him inch by inch. He’d left bruises and hickeys, scratches and fingerprints. He had bitten a circle around his collarbones, leaving as many reminders as he could that Yamato was loved, so loved. That he was a good person who deserved only the best this poor, broken world had to offer. By the time Yamato had left he had acquired a limp and a dopey grin. Letting him go to this duty had been the hardest thing Kakashi had had to do since the end of the war.

Kakashi shook his head to clear out the memories. Thinking of their goodbye only made him miss his lover more and dwelling wouldn’t bring him home any faster. Instead he forced his eyes back to the scroll and read on. It seemed their escaped convict had made it his first priority to get as far away from Konoha as possible. 

The farther he got in to the message, however, the more relaxed Yamato’s language became. Sharp, concise statements about the target became relaxed, whimsical observations about the scenery. There was mention of an onsen Yamato hoped to come back and visit. A pool of warmth ignited in his chest as he read an entire paragraph wherein the other man wondered whether Kakashi would enjoy the local cuisine or not because they couldn’t vacation there if Kakashi wouldn’t eat anything.

He understood why the letter had been delivered to him personally when he reached the end.

_I’ve missed you. I know I said I would be fine – and I am – but I don’t like spending so much time apart. We’ve had enough years of that already, don’t you think? Anyway. The Inuzuka you sent finally caught up to me. I’ve given her all the necessary details and she’ll continue the hunt from here on out. I hear you warned her three separate times not to engage without calling for backup? You’re such a worrywart nowadays. I’m heading home now. See you soon._

It was signed with his name and an adorably sloppy heart doodled next to it. Kakashi traced his thumb over the tiny drawing, feeling his own heart clench. They had been living together for a few months already but this was first time Yamato had ever called it home. 

When he let go the scroll curled in on itself, the parchment rolling up and hiding away the words. Kakashi left it there as he shed his Hokage robes and hung them up next to his hat. Then he turned off his desk lamp and left. The apartment seemed like it wouldn't be quite so cold now and he could use a good night’s rest. It would take Yamato a few days yet to close the distance between them and make it back to Konoha, minus the time it had taken the bird to reach him first, but having something to look forward to always made the time go faster.

As he left the tower and headed towards home, Kakashi tilted his head to the stars and took a deep breath in. He felt wonderfully light now. The stifling feeling from before had melted away to be replaced with a persisting happiness. With a new bounce in his step, he strolled off in to the night.


End file.
